forever restless

It’s messy. It’s jumbled. It’s complex. It’s my mind. And it’s forever restless.

There is not a time during the day when my mind isn’t racing with thoughts. Whether it be what I’m eating for dinner, what subject I’m studying tonight, or how I’m going to spend my winter break, my mind is always running rampant.

It can be a bit much, to never get a break from your own subconscious. Cause, I mean, how does one escape themselves? Is it ever truly possible?

I believe meditating will help put my mind at ease. For years I’ve denied the practicality of meditation. I never understood it, and to be honest I still don’t think I fully know what it can accomplish. Yet I’ve heard rave reviews on it, so how bad could it be.

A second method of release is journaling. I’ve done this on and off for a decade now, with my “off” periods lasting as long as a year. I know I love to write down my thoughts, but at some point I start to find it stressful. I have so much in my mind that I find once I start writing it’s like the floodgates have opened and I can’t stop. That’s good, though, isn’t it? Journaling is supposed to be getting all that shit out. For me, though, it’s a bit stressful cause then I don’t know when to stop. Writing about one topic leads straight into another and then before I know it my hand is cramped, my mind is tired, and I’ve filled the pages with mindless jibber jabber.

That’s why I like blogging so much. My fingers can type much faster than they can write. And seeing everything layed out helps me clear my thoughts. I can go back and edit what I’ve written. I can be clear and concise. It allows me to put my mind to rest, if only for a short period of time.

Ironic, though, since I don’t find this post has much of a point. It was just a ramble to get some thoughts out in the open.

Till next time, xx.

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2 comments

  1. i completely agree my mind is often jumbled with so many thoughts and ideas that i don’t know where to begin – journalling is something i love to do and it takes a while to find your rhythm, to find what works in how to get all those thoughts down ! xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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